We’ve all heard those dating app fables, that it was love at first swipe. You know, so and so’s cousin met her husband on Tinder and now they have 10 children.
I often swipe right only to meet the guy and realise that just one right can make a wrong. And when Tinder fails me, I seek solace on Happn’ and as a last resort, I break all my rules and start the conversation on Bumble.
After many tragic dates using apps, I quit them in September and have refused to download them again. Mainly due to the fact that the algorithm would have reset and I’d have to swipe through the tragedies before I can view any decent guy.
What caused me to delete Tinder, Happn’ and Bumble? It became a matter of storage, not just on my iPhone but emotionally. I was just sick of average dates, poor excuses for cancellations and being asked why I was on Tinder.
Most of the time you never get past the classic “Netflix and chill?”, and if you are lucky enough to dodge that bullet, you will most likely be met later with some lame sexual innuendo.
And time after time you narrow your criteria only to still find this character.
Or that they only want to “do a bit of cardio”.
And then there are times when you realise you must simply give up!
To be fair, I haven’t met the most amazing guys in public either. I met a guy on the train and we exchanged numbers and met up a week later and he planned the perfect bar crawl through Soho.
We ended our night at Piccadilly Circus, and while we waited for the bus, he rolled a joint and proceeded to smoke it.
I couldn’t help but laugh, the poor chap just couldn’t wait another half an hour to ‘unwind’ after a date with me.
As Lily Allen sang “it’s hard out here for a bitch” and she’s not wrong. Women have to constantly compete with the fact that for most guys, there’s potentially someone better a swipe right away.